The Yale Douchebag

I went to Yale.

I’m a nerd.

But not half as nerdy as the guys I’ve dated.

It’s funny because douchebags really are everywhere.

The ones I’m used to dealing with just really like calculus.

Once in college, I received an acceptance letter via email from a guy in my class.

It read: “I’d like to go on a date with you. Please let me know if you will be accepting this offer or declining my invitation. I look forward to hearing your decision in the coming days.”

I replied, “Unfortunately, I’m not interested in dating right now so I have to decline the invitation but thank you for your consideration.”

As if dating him was something I sent in an application for…

The next day I heard in my business law class that he was very offended I declined him.

He told his friends that I should have been honored that he would come up with such a creative and cute way of asking me out.

FYI an acceptance letter ain’t cute.


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